Recoil in HORROR and SHOCK as you look at her NAKED FOREARM.  Stare wide-eyed in FURY and DISGUST at that bit ABOVE THE BOOBS AND BELOW THE NECK.

TOUCH YOURSELF against your OWN WILL at her OPEN MOUTHED FACE.  When will it ever end?  Come back soon for righteous coverage of the inevitable DEGRADING FILTH at Gamescom.

** SOME OTHER THINGS **

Things that have been found or emailed in that are going on out there in the real world.


ACTUAL GAME NEWS: PIKMIN 3 ON WII U

Launches today!  If you do anything else of note other than getting out of bed then that thing should be buying Pikmin 3.  If you don’t have a Wii U then that’s your own fault.  Maybe it’s Nintendo’s fault a little bit as well.

ACTUAL GAME NEWS: KOKUGA ON 3DS

Slightly less mental than previous games by the creator of Radiant Silvergun but still massively brilliant and available now on the Nintendo eShop for about £13.

Maybe we’ll do a review at some point.

MEN IN GAME SHOP SELL SEGA SATURN GAMES

Men showcasing readily available SEGA Saturn games, which means Saturn hardware production should never have ceased.  Saturn stuff starts about 4 minutes in if you want to skip the GameCube bit.

One of them keeps on getting corrected by the other one but overall a good effort and does still help overall.

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Where can you go to find out who within SEGA Amusements has recently become married, or who is the best Approaching Middle Aged Russian Supplier Woman?  What about their latest exciting frolics to far away and foreign places?

SEGA Amusements Facebook Page is where!  They upload far more interesting photos far more frequently than the SEGA Flickr account people do.  Current favourite SEGA Amusements Female is the one with the curly shoulder length hair.

** SOME OTHER THINGS **

Things that have been found or emailed in that are going on out there in the real world, right now.


ACTUAL GAME NEWS

The SEGA Genesis Classics Pack 5 has been released on PC this week, you can download it from Steam HERE for £5.50.  But don’t think you can get your Xbox 360 Hori joystick to work with it because you can’t.

Unless there’s some clever thing out there to help, or we’re just awful at getting things to work properly.


THE SEGA TOILET GAME IS AVAILABLE FOR HOME PURCHASE

The ever-growing army of men OVER THERE reported on this a few days ago.  It’s a real contraption you can buy and put in your own home, which is fantastic news if you can easily afford to spend over $1000 on a toilet accessory and want to.

When what you really need is a new toilet seat because the wooden one you’ve got at the moment is far too urine stained.  Look, it’s got those areas underneath that look a bit green.


A NEW GAME WITH ULALA IN IT

So what’s all this about then?  What does she do in it?  Has this already been released and not done very well and now everyone is saying how under-rated it was?  Off to Google…

SOME OTHER THINGS done now, now go and have that third cup of tea you’ve been promising yourself for the last half an hour.

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Sonic at the Tokyo Games Show with 4 Japanese girls wearing 8 socks plus a hotel room booking under the name of Mr T. Hog.  It’s like the good old days when Sonic’s star was in the ascendancy and girls where throwing themselves at him, or blushing and acting all coquettish if they were Japanese.

The one to Sonic’s immediate right is already checking to see if there’s anything peeking out of the fur.  They won’t be smiling so much later on when all their socks have been dampened by hedgehog sperm.

** SOME OTHER THINGS **

It’s back like that annoying tumour that just won’t go away!  All the rubbish that cannot possibly be made into a full daily Update is being shoe-horned into a single post.  For those who cannot be bothered to scroll down it includes: Student discount, the new/old PSP and Richard Jacques.


SEGA’S TOKYO JOYPOLIS CENTRE IF YOU COME AT 6 JUST ONE WHOPPING

Average looking undergraduate and graduate Japanese students will receive discounts for Joypolis rides and attractions HERE.  Special offer also includes “Dipping Dots Ice Cream” and some UFO Catcher tickets.  Being a Japanese student has never been so much fun!


THE OFFICIALLY LICENSED ATGAMES PSP E1000 IS AVAILABLE TO PRE-ORDER FROM PLAY.COM

It’s still an insultingly high EIGHTY NINE POUNDS.  Look at that cheap sticker bar across the bottom, that’ll curl up at the edges and be on the floor in next to no time.  Even Blaze have higher build quality and design standards.


RICHARD JACQUES APPEARS IN MI6 CONFIDENTIAL MAGAZINE

Not a real MI6 publication mind but a celebratory James Bond magazine for Men who are desperate to live another life other than the one they currently have.  “Composing Blood Stone – Richard Jacques talks one on one about creating the Bond sound” so says the official website HERE.  Forget the interview, there’s a picture of Richard pressing a button!

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PANIC! PANIC! MAN OVER BOARD! TOO LATE! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, IT’S ALL OVER!  The continued march to oblivion that the Video Games Industry is on has spurred Nintendo into announcing a massive price cut for their utterly flailing 3DS.

Even the new UK telly advert that doesn’t include a single Woman holding it the wrong way can save it.


THE NEW SONIC THE HEDGEHOG SITE HAS A NICE AMY ROSE WALLPAPER IMAGE

Lacks any real editing potential, the open hand could possibly be cupping several pairs of Men’s testicles?  From HERE.


NO TIME OFF AT SAN DIEGO COMIC CON 2011

They’re probably only off for a fag and a cup of coffee not realising they’re never “off duty” to the Men With Cameras.


FURTHER PROOF THAT JOYSTICK JUNKIES KNOW NOTHING ABOUT VIDEO GAMES

An afternoon with Tara Lonng and a fresh pair of marigolds please.

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She out-danced the Morolians then she out-grooved the Rhythm Rogues.  What Ulala never did was bend over naked to show off her vagina, which is what ex-Playboy-Turned-G4TV-Presenter Sara Underwood used to do a lot of.

See the entire disappointing video and gallery HERE without the merest hint of “red void”.  All for the “Women In Games” campaign now, as long as previous paid jobs predominantly involved taking off all their clothes.

And possibly inserting things into one of their many available holes.


SONIC THE HEDGEHOG WITH AMY ROSE AT THE ANIME EXPO 2011

Could have tucked the “arms” in to make it look a bit better, HERE.  Plus a Man dresses up as Segata Sanshiro.


THINGS IN THE REAL WORLD THAT ARE A BIT LIKE SEGA

A spurious “Crazy Taxi” style taxi spotted in East London.  It wasn’t actually being used as a taxi :(

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The girl on the right seems lovely and also quite well developed…FOR SOMEONE WHO IS BLATANTLY OLDER THAN SIXTEEN, we hasten to add.

The 5 people that watch the Weekly Round Up video are going to feel enormously let down but it’ll just be another in a long line of constant disappointments that life throws up.  Here’s a video of that OutRun Cabinet that was rescued a while ago to cheer you up.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TaTB5Q11Dzc]

The clever people are saying if you were disabled you could play OutRun outside when going to the shops.  Life would be so sweet if we were disabled and had an OutRun cabinet on wheels.  We’d be such gadabouts!


WHAT THE MUSIC COMPOSER OF SONIC 1 AND 2 GETS UP TO AT NIGHT

Hides the shame of having such an old wife for a 53 year old Japanese man.

Wish we had a wife 30 years our junior and be able to carry a shirt off like that in public.  This is old news as Masato Nakamura and Onaga Maki got married 3 years ago.  It’s new news to us so we’ve been “Google Imaging” Onaga Maki most of the day.


TWITTER FOLLOW ANNIVERSARY CAMPAIGN OFFICIAL SONIC 20 CONDUCTED?

There’s a Sonic competition over HERE for anyone who just loves attempting to enter competitions with the help of Google Translate.

Like us.


NEXT WEEK

News that isn’t 3 years old, bunking off down the local arcade and more SEGA merchandise being flogged.

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There’s no Weekly Round Up video this week, signals the beginning of the end really.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RlcZFoWFBHI]

Instead here are some embedded videos of SEGA Superstars Tennis if you’re still unsure whether parting with £2.99 is worth it.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWtzI-uapxE&NR=1]

Which it is.  We bought 2 copies brand new, once the deal ends the prices will soar!

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4r_n-nsUCc]

There’s still 84 units of stock in at ChoicesUK.com HERE.


GROWN MEN WITH BEARDS CROWD AROUND BOX WITH SONIC STATUE IN

Well one man with a beard, but they’re still crowding around and one Man is even taking photos of the Sonic cakes.  What kind of idiot takes photos of Sonic cakes?


FAVOURITE GOOGLE ADSENSE ADVERT OF THE WEEK #1

0845 numbers are 35p a minute on our network so we’d better check we’ve got plenty of credit, some of that Sonic fan fiction is quite lengthy.

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[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhZ9n6ctGrs]


MUMMY WHY CAN’T SONIC SPIN AROUND THE LOOPS ANY MORE?

Because he just can’t, now stop asking me the same question every day.

You’re giving your Father and I cancer with your constant whining about the physics of Sonic The Hedgehog.  Face facts, he’s dead.


THERE’S A NEW FACE OF THE ENEMY AND IT’S NOT PRETTY

You’ve all got your speech bubble templates.


SOMETHING FOR THE WEEKEND SIR?

Sonic appears to be making his move, we’re not having sloppy seconds.

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Because that’s all SOME OTHER THINGS will be this week.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFEAFF32H2I]


WHAT’S ON SONIC’S 20TH ANNIVERSARY TWITPIC THIS WEEK?

It’s The Kings’s birthday this week so probably loads of birthday things.

Must get a Sonic with “thumbs up” arm soon.

Full of culturally misunderstood pornography starring young girls and enormous penises.

Arms by sides with emotionless expressions, satisfactory celebration of Sonic’s 20th Birthday.

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In the coming weeks the Update content is bound to thin a little bit, making the Weekly Round Up Video look even more desperate.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PEev1RJcquc]

** UPDATE FROM IT SUPPORT INTERN HANNAH **

Hannah says you might have trouble viewing the video above if you’ve been automatically opted in to Youtube’s HTML5 video trial.  Opt out as it’s the best thing to do, unless you really love being a “Beta Person” and like to point out “bugs”.


OH GOOD GOD THERE’S ONE WITHOUT ITS HEAD ON AND OTHERS WITHOUT HANDS!

Stopped shrieking in ABJECT HORROR just long enough to embed an image of the “Sonic The Hedgehog 20th Anniversary Figurine” assembly line.  Then went back to the shrieking.

We’re going to have nightmares for weeks now, the sheets won’t take the pressure.

Nobody has yet complained why poor Old Sonic is confined to a CRT PC Monitor.


SEND A BRICK TO NINTENDO TO VOICE YOUR DISPLEASURE

At all the personal user details and various other things you’re currently stuffing into your Nintendo 3DS.  Regular “Video Game Zeitgeist Reporter” GigerPunk submitted this chilling tale of corporate snooping.

Serves you right for taking all those 3D pictures of your female co-workers, no sympathy.


SAINTS ROW BOOTH BABES PUT TO GOOD USE

That’s “use” as in doing something else other than making nervous-looking men incredibly frustrated and spiteful towards all women.

“Bitch had better get those rims waxed”.  One final image from our new Flickr friend Faperture.

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