An image link in the comments section of Part 1 from Reader Professor Dumb now becomes an Update itself.  It’s the crotch shot of PS Vita Roadshow Wipeout Woman we’ve all been after, or rather we’ve been after.  In a decent enough 1366×2048 size but a rather disappointly average 96 dpi.

Such a strange and mysterious crotch area.  Insufficient surface creasing available to build up an accurate picture in the mind but just enough to know *it* is behind there somewhere, and *it* is probably very sweaty.

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There’s a Sony PS Vita Roadshow going on at the moment in Glasgow, Manchester, London and Birmingham.  Go along if you want, we’re not stopping you.  Go along and let a large electronics manufacturing corporation tell you what’s “cool.”  There’s probably a DJ Mixer there as well playing all of your favourite arpeggiated monophonic synthesized sounds at a range of 120 to 130 beats per minute.

But let’s all ignore the DJ Mixer.  Not because they’re all personality vacuums but because of Wipeout Blue Jumpsuit Woman!  Sony rolling back the years, who said making Woman embarrass themselves at Video Game events was consigned to a brief period between 1992 and 1996?  Not Sony, or us either!

Extremely disappointed there are no photographs of the crotch area, a jumpsuit like that is crying out to have its crotch area photographed at a variety of distances.  View the full horrifying set HERE.

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Call Centre Support Technicians, Japan.

About the Job

Call Centre Support Technicians wanted for lengthy contract positions within Sony Corporation specifically dealing with “latest to market” handheld technology.  The successful candidates will have experience in the following:
  • Diagnosing and remotely unlocking unresponsive units
  • Troubleshooting unresponsive multi-touch touchscreens
  • Diagnosing “physical spotting” on OLED screens
  • Identifying root causes of power failures
  • Troubleshooting firmware issues and patching


This is a great opportunity to join a large and rapidly expanding team of support technicians.  If this sounds of interest, please forward a recent copy of your CV by mail to Sony C/O Mr Kazuo Hirai, 1-7-1 Konan, Minato-ku, Tokyo 108-0075, Japan.

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Various Women in various Video Game and “Tech” internet telly programs whored out by Sony’s Playstation Network.  Ones with faces and thighs and other bodily parts Women have, including vaginas.  Ones that you could keep all to yourself if caught in a net or trapped under a large box.

Come on though the middle one, play the game.  If you’re going to be on internet telly talking about Video Games then at least show some tit.  What’s that you say?  You don’t have any tits?  Well at the very least have a “desperate past” we can all discover on Google Images with SafeSearch set to “Off.”

Like Ms Lee has, sort of.

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Pure and utter loathsome desperation here from Sony, publishing lies and exaggerations about the new/old Atgames “Street” PSP in an actual physical thing distributed to disgruntled and already-suicidal commuters.

See how many BLATANT LIES AND EXAGGERATIONS are present in Sony’s advert in The Metro, why not add an element of competition to proceedings by printing it out and give it to family, friends and people on the bus/train.  Once complete you may even wish to defecate into a bag and post off your entry to Sony, you can probably find a suitable address on the Internet to send it to.

If you’re having trouble then here’s a “starter template” done earlier, it’ll help you get going.  Haven’t uploaded the poo-in-a-bag image because it doesn’t exist yet, that’ll come after the 4th cup of tea which usually gets things moving along down there nicely.

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Here’s hoping an over-worked child at the factory cocked up the mix of fire retardant chemicals and all units will be stained yellow by 2013, by which time they’ll all be irrelevant anyway and consigned to landfill sites on the outskirts of Birmingham.

“Mummy Mummy I want a white Playstation3 NOW and I want three of them, I don’t want a black one any more as it’s old and rubbish.  It’s only TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY POUNDS you miserly old Nazi.  I’ve always despised you, now I realise why Daddy left home with the babysitter.  It’s because you’re old and saggy and everyone hates you, YOU GULLIBLE OLD CUNT.”

Here’s a picture of the White “Exclusive Edition” PlayStation3 on a White background set to JPEG quality 4%, JPEG quality 4% means we hate Them 1% more than Ubisoft.  See how it blends anonymously into the background along with its new owner.

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Sony are looking to hoodwink dimwitted parents of worthless teenagers everywhere with their latest marketing campaign.  The new-yet-old PSP set for release later this year costing an outrageously expensive EIGHTY NINE POUNDS will be aimed at teens and the “even younger”.  Jim Ryan of Them said so in some words he spoke at a person who then wrote them down.

Go on girls, get in.  Jim is very gentle really although he does have very big, calloused hands.

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Contestant voting is still open HERE for Season 3 of The Tester presented by PlayStation Network.  It’s the only telly show we’ll be watching from now on and will most likely push The Lovely Tara Long Show off top spot.

Things like this sometimes makes us wish we had a goal in life other than to never run out of clean socks.

Our current favourite is Jacob, mostly due to his belief that being a games tester really is a step up into being the next Yu Suzuki.  The reality of entering and exiting the same “game door” 1,353 times from Monday to Thursday probably hasn’t sunk in yet.

Friday is “Running At The Wall” day, that’ll be Jacob’s favourite day.  At no point will there ever be a “Yu Suzuki” day.

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Got criticised by Ubisoft for being unnecessarily “violent” about The Frag Dolls so let’s try and redress that as we unveil THE TWO NEW FRAG DOLLS!  The “Winners” Pixxel and Sabre wrote some stuff about what video games they like but that’s all just nonsense, we need to carry out a brief  inspection.

** PIXXEL **

Not able to check here but the Teeth must meet correctly and be in reasonable condition, the teeth serve as an accurate age indicator.  The Tail should be set well up the hind quarters and swing freely from side-to-side as well.

** SABRE **

Quarters should have plenty of width and strength and the feet must be well-formed, matching and not too small, flat or upright.  So in a proper 5 Stage PPE examination how deep does the anal inspection need to be?

Overall: 5/10

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Instead of farming out the job of producing a feature-reduced cheap knock-off version of the PSP to Blaze or AtGames, Sony announced yesterday at Gamescom they are doing it themselves.  They’d better get the reduced sound emulation quality just right, the knock-off market is a tough nut to crack especially if you’re arrogant enough to set the entry price point at nearly a ton.

 

Re-Re-Re-Releasing the same old handheld console nearly 7 years after release, this is how high Sony hold the Video Games community in regard.  It’ll be around ONE HUNDRED POUNDS FOR TIRED OLD HARDWARE WITH LESS FEATURES THAN THE ORIGINAL.

 

Right now the top brass of SCEE are dancing around an office with pictures of the general public printed out on A4 paper.  They’re rubbing those A4 print-outs all over their naked crotches and anuses.  Imagine that, Andrew House rubbing his sweaty genitals ON YOUR FACE.

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